Erin meets Captain Kangaroo from the Department of Defense.
So Wednesday morning I went to the JFK school of Government at Harvard to meet with this guy by the name of "Jim Walker" from the U.S. Department of Defense. It's not as scary of a situation as it sounds. See, my friend Tom is going to be working for a company that makes things that explode, and he needs a security clearance so he can, y'know, work.
I met with this guy at about 9:30. He sounded like DeepThroat and looked like Captain Kangaroo. When he left a message on my phone asking to interview me, he mentioned he had government credentials, and he mentioned them again when I spoke with him on the phone to set up the meeting. When I got there, he slid the little card wallet thing towards me, but didn't open it up, and I had to turn it around and peek at it, feeling very awkward the whole time. Also, I was wondering if he had a gun on him for some reason. Every time someone came in the room or made a loud-ish non-ambient noise, his head jerked up and he looked around. I am not kidding here.
I was asked questions like, "does Thomas leave the country often?" and "what are Thomas's hobbies and interests?" The latter confused the hell out of me. Wait, my friends do things besides watching movies, laughing at the same five inside jokes and occasionally drinking? Luckily, I remembered that he plays guitar.
The entire time, my palms started getting sweaty, and I was freaking out because I was paranoid that he'd want to shake my hand again when we got up to leave, and he'd realize I was nervous and equate that with me lying for my friend. Also, I was paranoid that I was being too enthusiastic. "Does Thomas have any considerable problems with debt?" "Not to my knowledge!" Oh man that sounded way too perky; he totally thinks I'm making this up.
Anyway, Tom hasn't overnighted me anything that would burst into flames, so I think I did okay at the interview thing. Though it could be too soon to tell.
God, I love Jill Scott so much it hurts. My boyfriend too, but in a totally different way.
Also, I don't think it needs to be said, but I obviously didn't win the lottery. A tax on the poor, I say!
I met with this guy at about 9:30. He sounded like DeepThroat and looked like Captain Kangaroo. When he left a message on my phone asking to interview me, he mentioned he had government credentials, and he mentioned them again when I spoke with him on the phone to set up the meeting. When I got there, he slid the little card wallet thing towards me, but didn't open it up, and I had to turn it around and peek at it, feeling very awkward the whole time. Also, I was wondering if he had a gun on him for some reason. Every time someone came in the room or made a loud-ish non-ambient noise, his head jerked up and he looked around. I am not kidding here.
I was asked questions like, "does Thomas leave the country often?" and "what are Thomas's hobbies and interests?" The latter confused the hell out of me. Wait, my friends do things besides watching movies, laughing at the same five inside jokes and occasionally drinking? Luckily, I remembered that he plays guitar.
The entire time, my palms started getting sweaty, and I was freaking out because I was paranoid that he'd want to shake my hand again when we got up to leave, and he'd realize I was nervous and equate that with me lying for my friend. Also, I was paranoid that I was being too enthusiastic. "Does Thomas have any considerable problems with debt?" "Not to my knowledge!" Oh man that sounded way too perky; he totally thinks I'm making this up.
Anyway, Tom hasn't overnighted me anything that would burst into flames, so I think I did okay at the interview thing. Though it could be too soon to tell.
God, I love Jill Scott so much it hurts. My boyfriend too, but in a totally different way.
Also, I don't think it needs to be said, but I obviously didn't win the lottery. A tax on the poor, I say!


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