Prepare the laser beam.

The Whales take Washington!

You know it's going to be a good day when you start it off with pictures of whales on Segways.

I'm almost completely moved in; there are a few boxes that are half-unpacked right now, but for the most part, we're settled. We put together the couch yesterday and it is so comfy. Apparently we're also getting my parents' kitchen table and (huge) old television, but that will get worked out at a later date. I think this is my first real grown-up apartment. I'm not counting the studio in Los Angeles because Steve and I were too depressed and/or busy to do anything with it, really.

When I gather up the energy to clean up a bit and unpack the rechargeable batteries (they're currently in the Wii remotes), I'll go ahead and take some pictures. But right now, I'm crampy as all hell and I just want to melt into the couch. And maybe walk to Target. Yes, I live within a mile of a Target. You totally want to be me.

Speaking of "crampy," my reproductive organs are a complete train wreck right now. I've been deliberately skipping every other period with my birth control (even with hormones, my periods are totally unbearable at times), but I guess it totally backfired on me this month, because I have been spotting and more recently, flat-out menstruating for nearly three weeks. I suppose I could tolerate that, except I had to cancel a pap, and then I couldn't get my rescheduled pap done either.

I kept the second pap appointment and used it to explain that I have random, occasionally intolerable, pelvic pain which is most often completely unrelated to my period, and also, I had been bleeding pretty heavily for a couple of days (despite not being on my hormone-free week). I figure I have endometriosis or something, because both of my sisters do, but my doctor decided to tell me that I could very well be pregnant.

This is incredibly bad, because 1) I was (am) having pretty serious pain a little to the (my) left of my uterus, and 2) I was bleeding at least an ounce a day (a normal period is 3-4 ounces, total) for a few days. This generally indicates an ectopic pregnancy. So, while I waited three hours for my blood test, I was pretty much convinced that my fallopian tube was going to burst open and I'd die of internal bleeding from a theoretical, totally unwelcome embryo.

Obviously that didn't happen, and my test came back negative. I had to fight with my doctor's secretary to give me my results (she had some bonehead excuse like, "the doctor's not here so I can't tell you), and when she finally called me back with them, she said something to the effect of "oh, you're only 23. That's great news, eh?" I guess that's good news, but I'm still bleeding and something is still wrong with my reproductive organs. I think by this point I've bled out at least 6 ounces from breakthrough bleeding, which leads me to believe that my uterus is a clown car full of uterine lining (uterus clowns?). Oh well. It's not like I care about my fertility.

I'm officially starting work on Monday, and I'm going to be paid a wage I can actually live on. Despite the ~80 minute commute, I'm pretty excited to get back to work.